My "Sabrina" Moment

I LOVE the movie Sabrina . . . it is one of my absolute FAVORITES! The soundtrack is the best, too. Just magical.

The other night, at about 2:00 am -- I could not sleep. So, I went downstairs, made a glass of ice to chomp on, and turned on Sabrina. As I watched the movie, I was reminded of my own Sabrina moment . . .

Sabrina was an insecure frump, who had a crush on a particular dashing young man -- who did not even know she existed. She adored this guy, but she was invisible to him.

She took a trip to Paris, where she "found herself". She came back from Paris confident, beautiful, and she gained the attention of the man who once ignored her . . . he wanted her, because she was beautiful. I will stop there with the story, because that is where my Sabrina similarities end . . . watch the movie, it is so fantastic!

I was 14, and I was going to my very first youth dance, at the church. I was so excited. I thought boys were great -- nothing better. My journal was filled with boy's names, and hearts, and current crushes. I was thrilled to go and dance the night away! When I got to the dance, I saw a particular boy that was very attractive (and every other girl seemed to think so, too). I was shy, but not willing to miss out . . . so I asked him to dance. He was polite and said, "yes." We danced. I was super excited, loving every moment. But as soon as the dance was over, he scampered away as quickly as possible . . . off to a group of cute, adoring girls. I could tell I did not impress him much. He made it very clear. Looking like this (image below) I just couldn't understand why?

Stop it. No laughing.

Fast forward a few years . . . time went on, and so did I. Like Sabrina, I went to my "Paris" (my journey of self-discovery). For me it was about running. I ran and ran and ran. I also started discovering who I really was. I started gaining confidence in being me. I started to like myself. Dare I say, I even loved myself! It felt good.

I wanted to change. Not too long after the Sabrina movie came out, I was inspired. I took my long floppy hair and drastically cut it. Along with make-up, and a new figure -- I felt pretty darn good about being me.

You can see the difference in my face!

Before:

I felt like a new person. I looked like a new person. I was ready to take on the world!

After:

There was another dance. The same boy who rejected me when I was 14 was there. He was still attractive, but after the brush-off years earlier -- he had lost my interest. However, I wanted to try something . . . I HAD to try something. I quickly devised a plan in my mind. I made my way towards him, and a slow song began to play . . . I asked him to dance. He said, "yes" with a little more eagerness in his voice than the first time. We danced and talked (it had been about 4 years) and he seemed very interested. (Funny what time can do.) The slow song stopped and we kept dancing . . . we danced together for the rest of the night. By the end of the dance he excitedly asked me for my phone number. Instead of offering it, I told him to give me his . . .

I never called him.

Yeah, I was mean -- but so was he. I just had to know, you know, if I had it. If I had changed. If I was who I thought I was, who I felt like. If I had arrived. He was just an experiment, a test. If only he would have been nice to me when I was ugly and awkward -- I am afraid that was something I could not overlook . . . no matter how cute he was.

His loss.

Being mean, doesn't pay.

You should never underestimate the awkward ones . . . they just might blossom one day! :-)

P.S. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. :-) He, he.