No Empty Chairs

During FHE last Monday night, we learned quite the lesson! The topic for FHE was, Our Heavenly Family. (We chose to use the new Gospel Principles manual lesson each week for our FHE -- so all of our lessons are "planned" all year long!) Things were going along nice and smoothly, and then our learning moment commenced. . .

I need to back-up to a little earlier in the day . . . That morning, one of Sammi's new Christmas chap-sticks had gone missing. We found out a little later in the day that Daniel had been playing with it, and he had mushed the lid onto the top of her most favorite strawberry-flavored lip-smacker (you know how it gets all gooey and ruined when you do that). Sammi was pretty upset about her ruined tube of lip-joy, and it became quite the "issue" (crying, accusations, denials, etc.) It took some talking-through, but I thought it was settled with apologies, and forgiveness.

As we went into our Family Home Evening lesson, the topic (smashed, oozy, chap-stick) was still fresh on everyone's mind. Despite the previous pre-teen drama, and the abounding strawberry scent throughout the house (the chap-stick was quite potent), the lesson began quite well -- with little event. Charles taught, and we all listened, happily. We were almost finished with the lesson, and we were all enjoying the message with smiles and bright eyes. And then, Charles began the speech that would send one of us to tears . . .

Charles began to describe how our choices will determine if we will be able to all be together forever, as a family. We were all for it, everyone nodded in agreement. And then Charles (who did not consider his words would inflict pain) used the phrase, "And some of us will not make it . . . some of us will not make the right choices." I added to his comments, and explained how we do not want any "empty chairs" in Heaven -- I want everyone of us to be there, together.

Now, it took me a moment, but then I looked at Daniel's eyes, and I could see something was not right -- something was cutting him deep, to his child-core. Then I realized what it was . . . but first, his eyes turned very serious, very concerned, very wet, and the sobbing began. Charles and I had not intended to make Daniel feel such an intense feeling of remorse. (Charles was unaware of the drama that had just occurred, over the loss of the sacred lip-gloss.) So, I realized, when Charles said that "some of us will not make it," Daniel had interpreted the "us" as in some of us, in our family -- he thought Charles meant him! Because, previously that day, he had made a "wrong" choice. Daniel, in that moment, felt the pain of a damned soul! I could see it in his eyes!

I quickly realized the "slip of the tongue" and how important words (even small ones!) are to children. Charles was just using the universal "us" (referring to all of God's children) but it was interpreted painfully, as the exclusive "us" of our family. It made a world of difference (literally) to Daniel! I cannot adequately express the fear behind his eyes . . . it was a sight to see. They were dark, and full of pain . . . a fearful pain.

So, thankfully, I caught the mistake and I took Daniel in my arms, as he sobbed, and I explained what Daddy had meant -- along with explaining the principle of repentance. I repeated, over and over, that he was a good boy, a wonderful boy, and that Heavenly Father loves him, and that he will make the right choices, and he WILL be with us, and our family, forever . . . even though he mushed Sammi's chap-stick. :-)